Monday, August 06, 2007

Single ladies making a house a home...

I received this email about two weeks ago...

Dear Mrs. U,
I enjoyed today's blog posting on creating a "SenseSational" home. Would you ever consider creating a blog entry on the single woman and her home? Some encouragement as to why she should bother doing ANYTHING to/or in her home? What you (and your readers) wish you had done or known before marriage and family, etc. etc. etc. It's so easy to see the point in creating a beautiful, restful "sanctuary" for a husband and children, but when it's just you..........why bother? It's easy to think your time would be best used elsewhere. I bet you could offer ALOT of encouragement, tips, and advice to many women.

anonymous - HA!

Just so that y'all know, I know who this "anonymous" person is...

Please allow me to introduce my sister, Miss F.,pictured here with Elizabeth. (I was going to share more lovely pictures of her, but I'm pretty sure she would kill me! LOL!!).

Okay, ladies, so what advice can you offer to her as well as to all single ladies? It's easy to see why single ladies with children should care for their home because they want to teach their children. But what about single ladies, living on their own with no children? Why should they even bother to "make their house a home"?

To be honest with you, I have never even thought of this before. That's why I'm coming to all of y'all. Please be sure and share ideas to encourage Miss F. in her homekeeping endeavors.

Oh, and by the way, if any of y'all know a SUPER GODLY single man, let me know!! Mr. U and I will be more than happy to check him out before allowing him to speak with Miss F!!! (Oooh... my blogging days are over... she's going to kill me for sure now!!!!)

I sure do love my sister.:)


Rachel said...

Don't know if you have ever seen the book "Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye?" by Carolyn Mc'Culley (her blog is here but she deals with this subject quite in depth. The main reason she gives is because single ladies have a great opportunity to serve others by hospitality in their house! Whether it be babysitting, having a family over for a meal, or just having friends hang out...creating a 'home' becomes a way you can reach out to others.

Earlier this year, two other single girls and myself were living in Thailand. Even though we were all living there less than a year, making our house a home became a big priority! It helped ease the homesickness. :)

Anonymous said...

How about being inspired by the idea that our home is a sanctuary that reflects our love and trust and comfort in our King. We can make it a place that honors Him and is a safe comfortable place for others to see His reflection in us and our home...
We don't have to be married or have children to offer such a place to anyone who crosses our threshhold including ourselves. Blessings on your sisters home! She's lovely...

Amy said...

I was totally going to refer you to Carolyn McCulley--I see someone already beat me to it :) She's an amazing, godly single woman with a great blog whether you're single or not--and like the previous commenter said, she addresses this kind of thing all the time. I am sure combing through her archives would be very edifying!

Melissa said...

I think we have the same ideas here - to glorify God by opening your home to others and to allow His light shine brightly from our surroundings!

Many Blessings!

Anonymous said...

Okay, my answer is not such a Godly one. :)
My answer is because you need to make a home that YOU enjoy being in. It's your sanctuary from the stresses and cares of the world. Make it nice for YOU.
I realize this sounds carnal but in my opinion it isn't. God wants us to enjoy His beautiful creation, to enjoy the life He's given us. What better way than to make a home for yourself that you enjoy?
I do have a family but I enjoyed my own home when I was single and I make my home now the way that I enjoy it. I paint it the colors I like, I have the furniture the way I want it, I buy the decorations that I love. Hubby doesn't care how the house is decorated-He just cares if it's clean. :) So, I'm free to do what I want. The kids all like my taste in things. Even though this is probably sounding self-centered (I'm having trouble putting my thoughts into words) it's not like my family is hating what I do with the house-you know what I mean? Everything I do is fine with them and I'm happy the way it is.
I believe our sphere is the home and we, as women, married or single, need to make our homes the way that pleases US. When our children grow up they can have their homes the way they like. And our husbands sphere is out in the world. I heard a teaching once where the speaker was getting down on husbands who try and control their wife's sphere, which is the home. They can have input on sheets and curtains but the wife has the final say, as it's her domain. I agree.
I'm too embarrassed to sign my name to this post, lol. I'm sure it doesn't sound right. I hope y'all understand what I'm trying to say.

Mary Ann said...

I do agree with anonymous-make your home a sanctuary where you feel comfortable and refreshed. While you may not be home as often as a mother would be, it will be a place of welcome and rest for you.

Before my sister and I were married, we lived together and worked hard to eat together most evenings as well as cooking a Sunday dinner on weekends. We received lots of strange comments from wives and mothers who thought if they were single, they would eat cold cereal and not bother to cook and do homey things! We shared a lot of our meals with others or froze leftovers to eat later on.

But even though, we worked a lot and were not home all day, our little home was a place of rest for us as well as a quiet and homey place for friends who would stop by. Our quality of life was much better plus it prepared us to be keepers of our homes for our husbands and families!

So yes, I think it is very worthwhile for you, whether single or married, to create a wonderful home where you are, no matter what your circumstances. It is important to us as women. :-)

Anonymous said...

Hello Mrs. U,

What a great topic!

I was a single lady in my own home for many years.

I liked what Ellen said about home being a sanctuary. It is, you know.

Honestly, I never had any problems with not wanting to make my home a haven of beauty and rest. I so looked forward to having my own home and working to make it as comfortable and soothing as possible on a tight budget.

As a woman, my main sphere of influence is the home and being a keeper of it. This home centeredness focus is a gift of God and it is not contingent upon having a husband and or being a mother.

Take Care,


Mrs. Pear said...

Oh, I love it when you post these easy questions (yeah right!)

I know that when I was single and living on my own (for about 2 years), I was just starting to get serious about my relationship with God, moving from being a social church goer to a child of the Lord. One thing He taught me was that I should keep my home well because He gave it to me, even though it was a little 1 bedroom apartment, it was still a gift from Him to be used well.

It also made me feel more confident having people over and practicing hospitality too!

It also prepared me for caring for a family - I had to basics down so we could add more without everything flipping out!

Paula said...

I agree with all the above, but have a few thoughts of my own.

When my home is organized, I am at peace - allowing me to hear His voice and sense His presence much more deeply.

When my home is decorated, I am ready to host - allowing my friends and family to feel comfortable dropping in at anytime.

Miss F has no idea what's in store for her. Should she wait for marriage to keep up her home? Most of us hope for marriage, but that may not become a reality for her.

Jen said...

I love this question because I thought of my own precious daughters and what I want to teach them about making a home. Recently, I heard a great Christian speaker say that a crisis is not the time to cultivate good, godly habits. So, using your time as a single woman to cultivate good housekeeping, cooking and organizational skills will be such a blessing and firm foundation to rest on when the "crisis" comes with a husband and family. Developing good routines and familiarizing yourself with how to run a home will be a tremendous blessing and strength to your husband and children. Instead of spending those first few years learning such habits, you and your husband can sail on to being hospitable, Christ-sharing, love-exemplifying, charitable, and gracious...all because you cultivated a heart that desires to serve others in the area of home-keeping.

I love this blog, by the way!

Miss F said...

Hi Ladies!

Thank you for the inspiration and encouragement! I'm starting to gather new ideas to add special touches to my home and make it "SenseSational". I better get busy!

Miss F :)

Mrs. Julie Fink said...

My daughter Kina is a wonderful example of a single young lady creating a beautiful home! And she uses her place EVERY week to encourage and bless others!

Julieann said...

Mrs. U--your sister is darling. As for advice, it looks like you have gotten some great advice already--let me think on this one some more:)

..I also came over to say, I will definately let you know when I go to Georgia--we most definately will have to get together:)))



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