Making a House a Home

From Living On a Dime...

In this day and age of fast food restaurants and convenience food, we tend to think that most people, when going through a hard time, don't need a meal or a jar of soup brought to them.
Many years ago, before there were stores or fast food restaurants on every corner or microwaves in every kitchen, a neighbor bringing in a meal was sometimes a matter of physical survival. That isn't usually the case these days.
Even so, I hate to see bringing a meal to someone who is sick, has just had a baby or has lost a love one fall by the wayside. We often think the person or family can just pick something up or cook something easy in the microwave. They probably can but there are a couple of reasons why it is still nice to bring someone a meal.
Usually at these stressful times people are exhausted, both physically and emotionally. When this happens it is so hard to think and make decisions. Just ask anyone who has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Trying to decide what to cook or buy for a meal can be very overwhelming. It's often the straw that breaks the camel's back.
Having someone call and say, "I'm bringing a meal for you tonight," can help so much to ease a persons mind, which is probably overloaded with other things. It is just one less decision to make.
Bringing food is a way of saying, "I love you," or, "I care." Food is comforting to most people. (I'm not talking about people overeating to comfort themselves so please don't comment on that). Being a grandma, the minute I know the grandkids are coming, I get out the cookies and candy and, when friends arrive, the first thing I do is bring out a plate of cookies or put on the kettle.
Taking a plate of cookies to a new neighbor says, "Welcome! We are glad to have you!" Taking a meal to someone who is sick says, "I care." Let's not let another way of saying, "I care," fall by the wayside.
I will try to share more ideas on this subject in a future post but, for now, here are a few suggestions to get you started:

• Make things as easy as possible for the person you are helping. Send napkins, plastic forks and spoons.
• Start looking now for inexpensive bowls, platters and dishes at garage sales. You can leave these dishes when you take food to people so they don't have to worry about returning the dishes. When you can, try to use disposable pans and dishes so the people who are already overwhelmed don't have to wash dishes.
  There is a time and place to save the environment and this is not it. I save and wash most of the containers that I get when I buy things at the bakery or the grocery store and reuse them at these times. You would be surprised how many containers you get every day that would work great if you remove the labels and wash them.

I've been reading over at Project Home Economics (LOVE that blog, by the way!!!) and learning so much! I recently read this from Elizabeth....

"Some brand new neighborhoods can be a bit bleak, as the landscaping is still bare in many years, and neighbors may move in and out so frequently and stay so busy that you may feel somewhat isolated. If you live in such an area, try this: make a chart of the streets in your neighborhood. Take note when someone new moves in. If you hear that someone has a baby, also take note. Bake goods and take them to these people. Invite people for dinner. Don't give up if people are busy and it takes a while to get them over; plan a month ahead if you have to.Wrap them well in case no one is home and you have to drop them off. Be the woman (or family) who prays about every street and every house. Do what you can to love your neighbors and make your neighborhood feel like a community. This will, in turn, bless you by making your home feel more like a home."

I would LOVE to hear how each of you reach out to your neighbors!!

Also, if there is anything special that your neighbors have done for you, please share!!!

My parents are good about keeping up with their neighbors. I love that. One dear man across the street from them makes a point of blowing off my parents' driveway every time he blows off his driveway!! What a kind thing to do!!

What is it, to you, that makes a home welcoming?

I received this email from a reader and she would love your help!!

I am trying to come up with a picture of what I want my home to be like. Would you mind helping me with some ideas? Think of one person/family who you love going over to their house. It's just a peaceful, welcoming home that you enjoy. Describe it: What words come to mind? What is it about the home that makes you want to spend time there?? What is it decorated like? What does it smell like? How do you feel when you are there? What kinds of things register with all 5 of your senses?

The most welcoming homes I've been to haven't been the kind that look like they came out of Southern Living magazine. They are homes that are clean and relatively tidy, but you can definitely tell that people live there. They aren't decorated with the most up-to-date styles or colors, but they are cozy feeling. They don't really smell like anything (unless they are cooking something)- no stinky odor, no trace of animals, no dirty trash can smells. It's not their homes that I notice, though. It is the people that live there and their warm, welcoming personalities that make me feel like they are glad I am there.

I liked Joyce's house because she was already ready for guests. She gets up pretty early for her quiet time and for cleaning so that when someone arrives, she's already cleaned for the day. And apparently she does a little cleaning every day so that every day something has been tidied. Plus, she always has a few cookies, a slice of cake, something yummy tasting to share with you as well as a cup of coffee or tea. She doesn't ask me "Would you like some coffee? Regular or decaf? Flavored or unflavored?".. she just makes what she has and says something like "May I pour you a cup of coffee?" (I always feel like I have to offer guests a billion choices).

I liked Diane's house because her door is always open for guests (literally- she does not ever lock her door and often leaves the front door open and only the glass storm door closed!!!). You walk in and feel like she's been waiting just for you to stop in. She's always full of conversation and questions and wants to know about YOU. She doesn't go on and on about herself (she does talk about her grandchildren, though. :) ) And she always makes lots of extra food at meals so that when people stop by at meal time (which is often!!), she can easily say "Come on it and eat!! I've got PLENTY for you!!"

So what about YOU? What, to you, makes a home welcoming? Please share!!!!!

My last blog post about hospitality is still fresh in my mind. I want to thank everyone that commented- I have learned SO much for all of you!!

My sister shared this post with me from Radical Womanhood. Since hospitality is on my mind, this post captured my attention. Here's a snippet....

When I was in Charlotte this past weekend, I learned a great phrase coined by my hostess, Jane Connolly. Instead of referring to women with grown children as "empty nesters," she speaks of such women as "open nesters." These women are in a season where they can now be open to new people to care for and new ways for God to use the experience and wisdom they have gleaned from rearing children of their own.

Wow!! What a wonderful opportunity to practice hospitality!! I'm not at this season of life yet, but now will look forward to it. I always thought that this would be a time to be sad and dread the empty home. This new way of looking at it, though, has given me a new perspective on it.

What about you? Have you ever thought of "open nest" instead of "empty nest"? Are any of you in this stage of life right now?

Does your home say "Welcome" when people come to visit? Is your family ready to have guests over for a meal? To stay the night? For friends who drop by last minute at dinner time? Are you prepared?

I found some wonderfully helpful Hosptality Tips recently at The Purple Cellar. Maybe some of these will prove helpful to some of y'all, too.

I would LOVE to learn from y'all about how your family handles showing hospitality. Does your family mostly have spend-the-night guests or meal time guests? Do you have guests over often? Do you always cook just enough for your family or do you cook extra just in case you have someone stop by? What are some helpful tips that y'all have learned over the years?

Please share, I have MUCH to learn in this area. Even though I enjoy having visitors, I still get nervous and would love to gather information from some of y'all that are pros when it comes to hospitality in your home.

UPDATE: I just found more hospitality tips over at Money Saving Mom!!!